how much pain does it take to bend someone? Feeling such warmth in my life, so much love and affection, to have it all suddenly taken from me. To be denied my nature. Place upon a pedestal for all to see, for them to cast stones. I hold my head high, I know in my heart who I am.
It's been a long time now since that moment. That moment where that love, that love that made me who I am was taken. I don't know if she stopped loving me before that moment, or if she does still and denies it. Every day without her is empty, my days melt into each other, weeks pass by, months.. I feel like it's already been an eternity. There are times the pain shook me so badly, for the first time entertaining thoughts of if I really could drive a piece of cold steel between my ribs, it would only take a moment, and then the pain would stop. Truth be told I'd never do such a thing, but I did think about it. I understand why someone would do it, more now than ever. This blog is called desires.. and I have one......
I desire the woman that made me melt with her smile. I desire her touch, the way that she laughed and danced about when she was happy. A woman who touched my very soul with her love and tenderness. Every moment with her was amazing. I never knew what it would be like to need someone... I need her, she completed me. She'll never know how much I do love her. She won't let me tell her..... No matter how much time passes, my love for her lives on. If you're out there, and if you read this, you know who you are, and who I am. I truly do need you, my heart needs you, my soul isn't complete without you.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
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