Forsaken

"Live what you believe" has always been my motto. All appearances point to a belief system that changes based on the current desires at hand. Is that how someone should live their life? What kind of person goes around preaching one thing and doing another? Too many in these present times it seems. This woman, the love of my life, sitting there, talking, as if she is someone that I'm no longer familiar with. It as if a stranger has taken up residence. After so much time together, wouldn't I have seen these hidden things? Could I have been so blind to trust her with my inner most feelings, desires, thoughts and feelings, to just have them bashed upon the rocks? How can someone claim so much love, and walk away? Did they lie, did they realize it wasn't love, did they fall in love with someone else? All these questions and not many answers. No one will ever know the truth to these questions. Acceptance of the cold reality is the only hope of survival. " Even if you were a fool to trust someone with your heart, you can't let it break you. Not everyone will be as cold as heartless." I tell myself through the tears. As my heart aches, with every beat feels like bursting. The pain radiates through me, I find myself on my knees "God please, I can't handle it anymore, please just end this, have mercy on me and just take me home." Silence is all that surrounds me, in the quiet darkness, as though all that exists has forsaken me.